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The Needy Child

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In my travels through Ireland one of the most beautiful sights I've seen has been that of heather blooming. Its brilliant magenta hues illuminate the neutral tones of a bog and make a striking contrast to the many shades of green in a field. For those who need this flower essence it seems to create an inner brilliance to dissolve the darkness of loneliness and need.

People who suffer the Heather imbalance often come from childhood backgrounds in which their emotional needs for attention and affection were never satisfied. Having been unable to find emotional gratification at home they learned to get attention wherever they could, and continue to do so.

In my counseling practice it's always a challenge to tell clients that they need this Essence, for the characteristics of the negative Heather state do not usually make for well-liked people. In the chronic condition they are the ones who who must always have an audience, either to tell you about their magnificent accomplishments or miserable woes. Unsatisfied with monopolizing your ears, they will often invade your psychic space, standing too close to you and perhaps grabbing you if you look as if you're trying to escape.

(There is a more introverted version of Heather in which, although people don't speak excessively about themselves it is clear that they are as self-absorbed as the more active ones.)

Few people will care to recognize themselves in the above description, and what I more commonly find among my clients is what I call "closet Heathers," those who--especially if they are consciously on a spiritual path which involves ego obliteration--resist their need for attention and emotional gratification.

They will often respond with anger to active Heather people, primarily because the latter exercise a form of self-expression which they have denied themselves. If you find yourself avoiding self-involved people this may be a clue that you need the Essence.

Heather is also common as a temporary condition. We all go through periods of crisis when we need to talk to people about what's going on. For those who tend to resist being open about their problems this constitutes an emotional breakthrough, and I wouldn't advise them to reach for the Essence.

In the positive state Heather manifests in the form of people who are wonderful and compassionate listeners. They know how it feels to be lonely and needy of attention, and they give without reserve.

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